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Tape RC-47
March 15, 1980 -- Cooper, Bast
COOPER: You know, getting back to Nan and her stupid honesty.
Do you know what I managed to cheat down my photocopy bill down to?
Get this . . .
BAST: What's that?
COOPER: $89.50.
BAST: Really?
COOPER: Now, Nan and I photocopied, I did three-quarters of what she
did. Okay? That's the way it generally went. . .
BAST: Yeah.
COOPER: She's paying an $800 bill.
BAST: Yeah, that's what she mentioned to me - $800 or something like
that.
COOPER: She started in on me yesterday.
BAST: Yeah?
COOPER: She said, "What was your photocopy bill?"
BAST: Do you think Nan might turn you in? I wonder if it's a good
idea . . .
COOPER: I didn't tell her.
BAST: . . . not to pay uh . . .
COOPER: I didn't tell her.
BAST: Yeah.
COOPER: You know what I said?
BAST: Yeah?
COOPER: I said, "It makes me sick to think about it, let's not discuss
it . . . .
BAST: Yeah.
COOPER: So, she said again, you know. . .
BAST: I know but she, what if she. . . what if she finds out from
them how much you paid? I wonder if it's, it's. . .
COOPER: She can't. It's a court record. Hey, there's no way she's
gonna find out.
BAST: Oh, she's not?
COOPER: In fact, I made a point, on Friday. . .
BAST: 'Cause see, she'd, she'd turn you in, you know, for defrauding
the government or something. . .
COOPER: I made a point last Friday. I said, "I'm going up to the
press room. . ."
BAST: Yeah.
COOPER: . . .um to talk to Ken privately. . .
BAST: Yeah.
COOPER: And then I went and paid. I didn't want her next to me when
she saw me writing out a check for $89.50. . . (garbled)
BAST: Oh, I see. . . I see. . . 'cause she knew how much you, how
much you got there. . .
COOPER: But she was watching very carefully yesterday. So I made
uh. . .
BAST: . . . because you see that's, that'd be considered a fraud on
the government.
COOPER: I know. But I made a point yesterday of being completely
honest about it. You know why? It's only fifty pages.
BAST: Oh, I see. So you paid them for the fifty pages.
COOPER: Sure. I said, "Why not?" You know?
BAST: Yeah, that's right. Yeah, well, you know, that's picayune
stuff there, you know. I'd. . . I'd, I, I would ju. . . . you
know. . . .
COOPER: Well, why should we pay $800?
BAST: Well, yeah.
COOPER: See, if we can pay $89.50. Right?
BAST: Well, yeah, that kinda makes sense.
COOPER: Well, if they (garbled) it's because they trust me.
BAST: But, I mean, but with Nan, I, I'd just as soon pay the full
amount and not have, you know, not be worried about her.
COOPER: Yeah. Don't fool around with Nan. Don't , uh, everything has
to be completely. . .
BAST: Oh no, I know that, that's why I'm saying, I mean she's down
there with you, and you know, she says she's friendly with those
Court Clerks down there. She might ask them how much you paid.
That's why I would just as soon. . .
COOPER: No. She's friendly with the. . . you see, I didn't pay to the
Clerk. I paid to the Finance Department. There's no way she would
know.
BAST: Does she know the Finan. . . who does she pay to?
COOPER: No, the Finance Department. The same place. You ring a bell,
and hand them your bill and hand them your check.
BAST: Oh, I see.
COOPER: And furthermore, I can say something ...
BAST: I mean really, those kind of expenses, I would suggest you not
chisel on. You do whatever you want to do, but uh. . .
COOPER: Don't worry. She's not gonna, she's not gonna turn me in on
something like that.
BAST: Damn, she turned in Ted Patrick.
COOPER: Yeah, but that's not uh. . .
BAST: She said she'd turn in her own son.
COOPER: I know. Now let me tell you though, what I did yesterday. . .
BAST: Yeah.
COOPER: Periodically, we need this guy named Bob Lyons. . .
BAST: Who's he again, now?
COOPER: He's the Court Clerk.
BAST: Oh yeah. Okay.
COOPER: It's like when the press comes down and we need to have the
paper filled in. . .
BAST: Maybe you ought to take him out to dinner, you know, or lunch
or something. . .
COOPER: No. . . no, you know what I did? And he almost fell over. . .
BAST: What?
COOPER: In fact, Nan. . . it allegedly came from both of us.
BAST: Yeah?
COOPER: Uh, a bottle of Chivas Regal, thanking him...
BAST: Oh, really?
COOPER: . . . he'd been so nice. So I bought it at the train coming
out.
BAST: Yeah? No kidding.
COOPER: And I got him a bottle, he was, he said...
BAST: How much did that cost us?
COOPER: Sixteen dollars. Cheap at half the price.
BAST: Yeah, yeah. That's right. Yeah, that's cheaper than a
dinner.
COOPER: Exactly, and he said, "Oh, I can't accept a gift like this."
No one's around. Now the important thing is that I wasn't coming
back, so it didn't look like any kind of a bribe. . .
BAST: Yeah, yeah. . .
COOPER: . . . and I said, Nan and I are so grateful.
BAST: Yeah.
COOPER: . . . that you've gone out of your way on so many occasions
that we absolute. . . uh ...
BAST: Did Nan pay for half of it?
COOPER: No, but she's going to.
BAST: Oh, I see. It only costs our client eight dollars then.
COOPER: Well, if we can collect from Nan.
BAST: Yeah. Right.
COOPER: So, she. . . . To collect money from her isn't hard,
incidentally.
BAST: Yeah.
COOPER: With all her honesty.
BAST: Yeah.
COOPER: As to getting, uh, getting a document from her. . .
BAST: Yeah.
COOPER: . . . you know, which you can ask her. If you give her
anything, it's, you might as well flush it down the toilet. (2-3
words unintelligible)
BAST: So, Bob Lyons was happy with the uh . .. Chivas Regal?
COOPER: Ecstatic . . . I could call him up at any point and get
anything. . .
BAST: Oh, beautiful.
COOPER: . . . for sixteen dollars.
BAST: Oh, beautiful.
COOPER: So that was a good move.
BAST: How old a guy is this Bob Lyons? Is he a younger man. . .
COOPER: No.
BAST: . . . or older man?
COOPER: Like fifty-five. Married, kids, blah . . .
BAST: Oh, I see, yeah.
COOPER: . . . I rememb. . . you know, I mean, I don't care for the
man, but I can get; never can tell when we need him, and he, he. . .
BAST: That's right. Hey, he's a good contact there.
COOPER: . . . he works at the. . .
BAST: . . . a good contact.
COOPER: You know it, so that was um. . .
BAST: But he wasn't going to take it at first, until you said. . .
COOPER: No.
BAST: Look it's only your. . .
COOPER: He's not allowed to. . .
BAST: Was Nan with you?
COOPER: Yeah.
BAST: Oh, so, you said look, it's just the three of us, nobody
knows,
take it.
COOPER: That's the point, nobody's here. . .
BAST: Yeah.
COOPER: . . . and I said, if you don't like Chivas Regal, uh . . .
BAST: We'll get you whatever you want.
COOPER: I said, no, I got it at the train station, so that he would
know that I was the one in back of this whole thing. . .
BAST: Oh, I see that you're the. . . that Nan wouldn't take the. . .
COOPER: I . . I carried it.
BAST: . . . credit, you took all of the credit.
COOPER: But I said I got it at the train station.
BAST: Yeah.
COOPER: So I said you go and exchange it for whatever you like. He
says "Oh, I love this." You know. . .
BAST: Beautiful.
COOPER: He was ecstatic. So, it turned out to be for sixteen dollars
and we may have made a life-long friend.
BAST: Oh, beautiful. |